Understand this: depression is not the real issue here. It’s just a symptom. What’s really at play is a suppressed state of Anger. A deep-rooted anger. But you’ve mistaken this anger for depression because you’ve suppressed it for so long. You’re squashing something down. Your anger. When you pile it up, accumulates it over time and eventually it morphs into sadness, it becomes your depression.
This suppressed anger – it might not be directed at anyone specific, it is a deep-rooted resentment. The point is, it’s boiling inside you. You were told to be nice and smiling since childhood, right? But were those smiles genuine? No. All this while, a storm of anger was simmering underneath. You’ve been sitting on it; hence, the depression. See, depression is like fighting ghosts. It’s the anger that’s real. Focus on why you’re feeling so suppressed. What has got you so worked up? Probe and question your emotions, and you’ll see the anger that’s been festering for years.
Now here’s a thought: let it out! When was the last time you felt alive after unleashing your anger? There’s something liberating about it. Your so-called depression will vanish with the outburst. Allow it to outburst, it will release the energy of your anger. It is just like a pressure cooker, when the lid is still on, you are suffering from the intensity, now open up the lid and release the pressure. And the depression will be all gone.
It’s important to recognize that societal norms and expectations have played a significant role in suppressing anger. From an early age, we are made to don different masks, concealing our true selves from the world. Why is that? Because society might not be ready to accept who we really are. This conditioning isn’t exclusive to you; it’s a global phenomenon influenced by the so-called ‘moral standards’ set by authority figures.
Consider how paradoxical the messages we receive as children can be. For example, when you showed anger as a child, were you not reprimanded? The very people, perhaps parents or teachers, who told you that showing anger is wrong, displayed anger towards you when you didn’t comply. Their anger instilled fear, but you couldn’t retaliate. Reciprocating with anger was out of the question because then you would be labeled as bad or defiant. There’s a twisted sense of morality, ingrained by religion, educational institutions, and society at large, that prohibits us from being natural, from expressing genuine emotions.
This leads us to an interesting observation: society seems to be more accepting of sadness than anger. Sadness is like the ‘feminine’ counterpart of anger. It’s a more subdued, passive way of expressing discontent, and hence, more tolerable in the eyes of society.
What about the instances where a child faces abuse? Imagine a child being hit or verbally attacked by a parent. This child isn’t allowed to retaliate, to display anger, or even to cry. They have been conditioned to believe it’s wrong to be angry at a parental figure, regardless of the circumstances. They suppress the anger with every ounce of energy they have, and that suppression is agonizingly painful, especially for a young soul. It’s crucial to remember that parents, too, might be victims of the same conditioning.
This all-encompassing suppression of anger morphs into a deep sorrow which psychotherapists often label as depression. But let me tell you, being angry is not inherently wrong. There is something raw and beautiful about experiencing emotions in their truest form, including anger and sadness. They are as much a part of the human experience as joy and happiness.
So, embrace your emotions, even anger. Let it be an outburst if that’s what is needed. Think of it like a pressure cooker that’s been on the heat for far too long. Release the lid, let the steam out, and relieve the intensity that’s been eating at you.
To do this, establish a daily ritual of emotional release. This could be through shouting, crying, or whatever means that help you vent that pent-up anger without harming yourself or others. It’s a process of catharsis, an unburdening of the soul.
And as you free yourself from the chains of suppressed anger, you’ll find something magical happening: your smile will become genuine, your laughter unforced. You’ll experience the euphoria of being true to yourself.
Bear in mind: Eschewing the anger by diverting your focus elsewhere is akin to placing a bandage on a festering wound. Resorting to antidepressants might seem like a solution, but in reality, these medications merely cloak the anger, offering temporary relief while the seething anger continues to brew beneath the surface. It’s also worth noting that oftentimes, psychologists might find themselves at a loss in tackling this issue, as they too grapple with their own inner turmoil. They, like anyone, might be weighed down by depression, and in some cases, their struggles could be even more profound than yours.
It is essential to recognize and address the suppressed anger that often masquerades as depression. This anger, a raw and integral part of our emotional tapestry, needs to be acknowledged rather than subdued or ignored. Societal norms and pressures may have conditioned us to wear masks and hide this natural emotion, but it’s imperative to break free from these shackles for our mental and emotional well-being. This is not a journey that can be rushed or substituted with temporary fixes like medication. It requires genuine self-reflection, the courage to embrace and express our true emotions. As we liberate ourselves from the heavy chains of suppressed anger, we open the doors to authentic living, where smiles are genuine, laughter is hearty, and the soul can finally breathe freely. This unburdening is not just an act of personal healing but a step towards building a more empathetic and emotionally honest society.